You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
is wine microwaveable?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
