I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
