sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
