I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
