dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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