first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
