so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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