Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
