soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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