...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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