Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
