5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
