Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
