And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Can I color on your dick again?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Randomize
