My balls are so social today.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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