that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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