It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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