3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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