Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
