On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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