He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
