Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
