No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
