I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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