# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
