Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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