it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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