We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
