Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
