For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
How's work?
Spinning.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize