his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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