Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
