yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
