Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize