Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
