I need help removing her.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
