The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
