it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
