I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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