he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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