____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Sponge bath it is.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
