i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
