Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
