Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
