you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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