why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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