Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
