her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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