who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
they need to just BURY HIM!
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
