When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
